Apple blames iPod nano screen defects on obese Americans/tight pants

Apple today officially acknowledged that a small number of iPod nano owners have reported problems with the hot-selling music player. Customers are reporting instances where after removing the iPod nano from their front pockets (much as Steve Jobs did during the iPod nano’s famous unveiling) finding that the nano’s LCD screen is cracked, and in some instances, no longer works at all.

Apple’s SVP of Marketing Phil Schiller said today in a press release “…this issue has affected less than 1/10 of 1 percent of the total iPod nano units that we’ve shipped. It is not a design issue. It has more to do with obese Americans in tight pants putting the nano in their front jeans pocket, and then sitting for extended periods of time.”


Blaming the nano’s screen issues on fat people is not the first time Apple has come under fire for attacking its super-sized customers. In 1998 the American Obesity Association filed a complaint against Apple charging the company’s hot-selling iMac computer shipped with a miniature keyboard and mouse that could not accommodate the enlarged fingers of obese Americans. In the complaint, the AOA alleges the keyboard made correct spelling all but impossible for large fingers that would sometimes accidentally press up to 3 keys at a time. The “hockey puck” mouse that shipped with the unit was also criticized for not being able to support the increased weight of a 7 pound hand. During extended use the track ball would often become oval-shaped, causing the mouse to stop functioning corectly.

The AOA’s Gabrielle Vargas says Apple computers have always been a favorite of husky Americans, due in large part to Apple’s insistance on using the 1-button mouse. The 1 button mouse is perfectly designed for fat fingers which often find multi-button mice unwieldy. Apple has also designed its operating systems to be navigated with a single-click mouse, eliminating the need for right-clicking. “It is this loyalty from our members” says Vargas, “that has helped Apple capture over 3% of the personal computer market. For Apple to now blame manufacturing defects in its newest iPod on ‘fat people wearing tight pants’ is just plain wrong.”


According to the AOA, Approximately 127 million adults in the U.S. are overweight, 60 million obese, and 9 million severely obese. If Apple worked harder to actively cater (no pun intended) to the obese, it could mean a huge (no pun intended) increase in market share.

Apple, for its part, seems to realize this. It has offered to replace the “defective” nanos. However, they are insisting that all customers weighing over 230 Pounds also agree to sign a form stating they will carry their nano in an altoids case for protection.


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Comments
128 Responses to “Apple blames iPod nano screen defects on obese Americans/tight pants”
  1. Charles says:

    Today, I made myself chicken marsala. It is my favorite home meal. I only ate two servings of it too, and when i was going to get another serving, i stopped myself. But then 2 minutes later i grabbed 2 cookies out of my pantry =[

  2. Marco says:

    time for the iPod Jumbo !

  3. Emma says:

    You’ve got to be really stupid not to know that there’s an American Obesity Association.

    Idiots.

    And it’s funny to see how many ignorant and narrow minded some people are. I guess the internet gives wimpy and coward people a chance to make fun of people who are overweight. Sure, it’s their own fault they’re overweight. And if you feel superior by making fun of them, go ahead.

    Anyway, the moral of this article: Don’t sit on your freaking ipods. Any idiot who sits on their ipod nano is bound to break it. Holy crap.

  4. Mitch says:

    Is this a joke? sure, i bet way more fat people break their stupid little ipods than some little skinny emo kid, but it doesnt matter whether your fat or skinny, stupid or smart, if you sit or fall on your ipod, its going to break. If you really care about the thing, dont be an idiot and break it. Oh, and tight pants? how many fat people do you see wearing tight pants? I know I dont see many, but hey, if its another reason to screw with fat people, why not? were all dying to point a finger at someone for an issue that really doesnt concern us. Fact of the matter is that apple doesnt need to blame anyone for their tiny little mp3 players breaking. Buy something with a little substance to it if your afraid of breaking it, morons.

  5. MG says:

    I was just reading all the comments about the NANO. I have never owned an MP3 player and was considering purchasing one, just didn’t know which one to choose. What I do think is sad about this entire post, is he way people are attacking overweight individuals. As a member of the medical profession, we see those that are overweight due to eating, and a large number who are overweight due to medical problems. These problems include thyroid conditions, and also increase in weight due to medications. Did you know many of the medications on the market make you gain a significant amount of weight. Anyone with Asthma, arthritis and any other condition where steroids are used will GAIN WEIGHT. Do you know how many people that affects? Please people educate yourselves before you make statements that make you look retarded.

  6. Jessie says:

    I own an Ipod Nano and was very happy with it at first. I had heard about the screen defect and I asked the sales person about it when I was purchasing mine, and they reassured me that It was a small number of Ipods that were effected. Low and Behold no more then 5 months ofter purchase, my Ipod nano’s screen is cracked and the ipod itself is no longer working. I did not sit on my ipod nor did I fall on my Ipod. I do not know why it has cracked. All I know is for $350 dollars I expected better quality, especially from a well known company like Apple. I am not obese nor am I american, but I just felt I should contribute this.

  7. ricky weedon says:

    i don’t think that people do get bad eyesight as i am not an american

  8. Leslie says:

    no matter what you shouldnt put a thin electroinc device in your pick anyways…it is their own fault, but i do not undersatnd….my friend go one and she had hers in her pocket and it broke. she is 115 lbs and she was wearin sweats…so y is this focused on obese people with tight clothes?

  9. Big fuggin dave says:

    im fucking pissed my shitty ipod broke and apple wont even do the fucking right thing and replace the sucky piece of japanese crap i hope all apple employes rot in hell and by the way i am not fat and do not wear tight ass pants mabye if they make the ipod bitgger than my penis then maybe just mabye there will be less reports of cracked screens

  10. Anonymous says:

    you know why he is so fat? he is full if chit man, eats crappy. keeps it all pent up inside. let it go bro… your too heavey…

  11. toby says:

    mine cracked while in my pocket. then it stopped working alltogether. can i get the screen fixed? or replaced?
    tklawrence123749@hotmail.com

  12. Jay says:

    yeah we should all go on a meth diet and be skinny faggots with no muscle……………I hate skinny people grow some muscle.

  13. Kristi says:

    OK, I am not fat and I don’t carry my Ipod in my pocket & the screen still cracked. I actually have it in a padded protective case. So what’s up with that??

  14. Epsilon says:

    GO JIMBO! I weigh about 150 pounds, but I’m fat in spirit. I just have a fast metabolism. 😛

    anyway, it’s, uh… rather disturbing how so many people are taking this seriously. it’s kind of a good idea to make sure you’re not in the humor section or something of the like. and what the hell is everyone’s problem with fat people? just goes to show how shallow we are as a society… what a generation I was born into. >_>

  15. McNugget says:

    Anybody who sits on their iPods have a high chance of breaking it, whether you’re fat or thin.

    Btw, this is probably just a joke so I’m not going to bother taking this seriously.

    The other day I sat on a cheap calculator and it broke. I’m not going to complain to the company about that. So why should anyone complain about breaking their iPods?

  16. Owen says:

    Well it still doesnt fuckin help me does it, ipod nano 3rd gen Screen stopped workin they blame fat people, well what about me i have a fuckin case an im not fuckin fat!

  17. the kid says:

    This is the most pathetic crowd I’ve seen.

    This is not real, fat people weren’t complaining about their i pods breaking. Besides Ipods are poorly constructed, well the defected ones are.

  18. Jonas says:

    For goodness sake, if you’re too big (i.e. the average American), get moving and drink less soda, and you can enjoy products manufactured for the average PERSON (not fat American). It’s not Apple’s fault if you break things with a 3.5 (wtf!?) pound hand.

    I am certainly not in favor on being harsh against minorities or disabled people. But people who (in the very large majority anyways) (pun away) become obese, fat, incapable of moving to their fatty foods and coke light without the aid of a motorized, oxygen-integrated, shopping vehicle BECAUSE THEY chose to become like this, sorry, NO sympathy for them whatsoever. And fat americans are no minority anymore, hehe.

  19. Snowman says:

    These comments are a laugh, but damm whats up with Fat people,can’t they ever accept that being fat is NOT normal ,only if you have a disorder and not a “eating disorder” then maybe you could understand but people are not made to be fat ,take a page out of the book of technology and you will soon find out that everything is “Slimline” what does that tell you ????? Loose some weight ,Drink water instead of soda hey even try cooking a home meal instead of fast food ,buy hey cooking might just be too much work,oh who am i fooling just eat yourself into obesity who really cares

  20. Im sure it is not only fat people. Females tend to wear extremely tight clothing as well. Apple should not replace all the screens….but then again, if it were my nano I would be quite happy if they did, and I would be sure to be a repeat customer 🙂

  21. Meh says:

    I don’t get why the fatties would complain about the Altoids solution. It’s an excuse to eat after all.

  22. Some Guy says:

    This sucks!! This is discrimination against normal people. If I break my ipod, I only get a new one if I am fat! I’m going to fire my fat employees tomorrow.

  23. Viscious Vixen Mission Stardust says:

    Gaw’d y’all are so F’N retarded. The Internet is full of you morons sitting behind computers thinking ya’lls so clever and all. You know what, get all your fat asses off the computer and out in the sun. and BTW, THE ARTICLE WAS A JOKE!!! God damn. You people are so stupid with your comments. Damn Twitter Facebook and Myspace. Has how grown a generation of Morons. and yah, I’m talking to you little bitches. Suck my twat.

  24. Ruby says:

    Hmm… I know this was some time ago, but….

    Does anyone know that there are certain diseases and medical conditions that make people fat/obese? They could be the healthiest, most active whatever person, and still be obese?

    It’s not just because of too much food and laziness…

  25. angela says:

    it’s not whether someone is fat or not, it’s the pressure of wearing tight clothes. are you people kidding with this topic? there is no reason apple should have to replace anything. they are being really nice by doing so. it’s like blaming the ground for being too hard for breaking an ipod instead of the fact that someone dropped it. wear clothes that fit and stop squishing the nano!!! christ!! they make cases for a reason…protection. this is not limited to dropping and scratching…why are people getting so bent out of shape. it is a product that works over 99.9% of the time when used properly. it should be in a case anyway, that’s why they sell them. stop being to sue crazy and retarded, just use it for its intention.

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