Where are they now? Bike messenger/screenwriter Brian Durkin
No, seriously, where is he? This isn’t one of those “We’ve tracked down Brian â€“ let’s see what he’s up to” kind of articles. I’d like it to be, but I just can’t find any trace of him at all.
Above: “DUDE! You’re getting a Mac!”
Who is Brian Durkin, you ask? Well, way back in 1994, Apple ran a series of PowerBook ads featuring folks like Todd Rundgren, Art Monk, Tama Janowitz and Martina Navratilova, all showing how/what they used their PowerBooks for, often with humorous side notes thrown in. However, one of the ads strayed a bit from the celeb formula to include two average Joe’s â€“ “Sales manager” Barry Ashley, and “Bike messenger/screenwriter” Brian Durkin.
I’m sure Ashley is a lovely fellow, but of the two, Durkin, with his Vanilla Ice good looks, hoop earing, skateboard (why not a bike?), and clownishly over-sized clothing (complete with giant novelty buttons) is clearly the more interesting of the two. Among the fascinating things we learn could be found on Brian’s PowerBook are “My rÃ©sumÃ©… A really bad poem I wrote… The number of Ray Bazire, who owes me money… The first four pages of my new screenplay… thoughts on self improvement… ” and “my attempt at a rap song“.
I would more or less kill to read ANY of those things.
A quick search of IMDB seems to imply Brian was a better bike messenger than screenwriter, as he does not seem to have written anything (yet) that has been published (3 other Brian Durkins show up (2 actors and an editor), but they do not appear to be him). In fact, Google-ing him seems to return zero results, something I thought was impossible these days. Same for Ray Bazire, who apparently owed Brian money.
Above: (click to embiggen) No offense to Barry Ashley, but Durkin’s clearly the man.
One other ad in the series featured “regular people” â€“ writer Greg Ketchum and photographer Michael O’Brien, both of whom seem to exist, so I am reasonably sure Durkin is not a figment of an Apple ad exec’s overactive imagination. So I put it to you, faithful readers. Where in the world is Brian Durkin? There are so many questions that need answers. Like, “Hey Brian, what was up with that shirt?”, and “Oh my God, Brian, what the f$#% was up with that SHIRT!?!?“. So if you know where Brian is, please let us know. He is truly on of the more colorful pieces of Apple history â€“ our “DELL Dude”, if you will â€“ and his legacy deserves to be cherished.
[pics via aresluna]