Stop the madness! Please sign the “iPad is NOT Magical” petition

Apple Inc. has long been known to overuse favorable adjectives when describing its products, and while we as Apple fans have perhaps grown immune to words such as “revolutionary” and “amazing”, Apple’s insistence in using the word “Magical” to describe its new iPad is just unacceptable.

Even in today’s press release announcing the ship date would be delayed by a week, Apple insisted on using the term multiple times, as if something truly Magical would be susceptible to mortal production and shipping issues:

“Apple® today announced that its magical and revolutionary iPad will be available in the US on Saturday, April 3”, states the release. Steve Jobs goes on to say “We’re excited for customers to get their hands on this magical and revolutionary product and connect with their apps and content in a more intimate, intuitive and fun way than ever before,” when in fact the way the iPad allows us to “connect with their apps and content” is identical to the way we have already done for 3 years on our iPhones and iPod touches, albeit on a larger screen.

Using the term “magical” cheapens the iPad and makes Apple, a TECHNOLOGY company, rooted in science, look like a foolish snake oil salesman.

So please sign this petition to have Apple drop the term “magical” from its iPad marketing speak, lest your family be cursed for 1,000 years by the gypsies of good taste.

-Dr. Macenstein
Macenstein.com

Comments
20 Responses to “Stop the madness! Please sign the “iPad is NOT Magical” petition”
  1. Dan says:

    Dude, as much as I like them, I’m not that worried if their marketing department pulls asinine moves like this.

    Now if I had stock, I’d care. But I don’t, so I don’t. They’ll learn soon enough how silly it makes them look. Maybe they’re trying to appeal to small children in this instance?

  2. Jonro says:

    It sounds like Steve Jobs has been spending just a little too much time with the Disney marketing department.

  3. Jake says:

    Now now, don’t go calling things you’ve never seen with your own eyes specifically not magical. Unicorns? Things of magic. Elves? Magic-like.

    Your petition filled with signatures? Now that’s magical.

  4. @ Jake,
    ZING!
    True. Although I don’t know what I would do with those signatures even if I got them. Not sure how I would send them to Apple, nor did I realize you’d need a twitetr account or log in to sign. . I guess I should have researched free petitions better…

    🙂

    – The Doc

  5. DJ says:

    Disney uses “magical” a lot, but it turns out that what they’re doing is not really magic at all. It’s just science, art, and advertising. Sorry kids.

  6. Brian says:

    They really should be careful using the “m” word. If they present it as being too magical, they might get some backlash from the fundamentalist christian groups claiming that it utilizes some kind of witchcraft technology. Remember the Harry Potter fallout?

  7. Jack says:

    Exactly, Its Not revolutionary or magical!

  8. Jay says:

    A great iPad marketing slogan on American TV would be:

    This is the iPad,
    It’s wonderful.
    It’s something you want…
    It’s FUCKING AWESOME DUDE!!!!….

    Think FUCKING Different….

  9. media_lush says:

    not cool

    until you’ve actually played with one for awhile

    then make your appeal if you still feel the same

    all the reporters who’ve actually used it say it matches the hype and that you have to actually experiencing using it to understand how amazing it is

    I’m disappointed at this petition coming from a fanboy site

  10. christopher says:

    @Media_Lush, I don’t think it’s a question of whether or not the product is good, but the adjective used in describing it. The iPad is not magical. It can’t cast a levitate spell or bend the very fabric of time, and if you rub it, a genie will not come out and grant you three wishes.

    When I first saw the new iPad ads on the Apple page, I couldn’t help but shake my head at the word ‘magical.’ I’m going to have to agree with Doc on this one.

  11. Langoor says:

    I would have signed this petition, but it needs a damn fucking petition account/twitter account. So annoying! Crap! Oh Crap!

  12. JorgeLuisBorges says:

    magical |?mød??k?l|
    adjective
    1 relating to or using magic : a magical crystal ball.
    • resembling magic; produced or working as if by magic : he had a gentle, magical touch with the child.
    2 beautiful or delightful in such a way as to seem removed from everyday life : it was a magical evening of pure nostalgia.
    DERIVATIVES
    magically |?mød??k(?)li| adverb

    … I think Apple’s going for definition #2 here, in other words: “magic” ? “magical”.

  13. JorgeLuisBorges says:

    edit: “magic” != “magical”

  14. Digital Mercenary says:

    Wasn’t it Albert Einstien who said roughly “any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic?” Maybe it contains sufficiently advanced technology. We will see.

  15. ObamaPacman says:

    Come on, you don’t like the magic unicorn pad??? =p

  16. Christopher says:

    But will Joe Schmoe look at that ad and make the same connection?

  17. nexfraxinus says:

    But it indeed is magical :3

  18. Jack Aubrey says:

    I heard that they are already working on an New iPad that has 14% more magic, 5% more sorcery, and 18% less voodoo.

  19. Christopher says:

    But what about the wizardry and incantation numbers? Don’t leave us hanging!

  20. Allam Karpatchian says:

    The iPad is one of the most Magical and Revolutionary devices ever created by man.

    It surprises me that people don’t understand what drives iPhone, iPod, and what will be iPad sales. The same people are surprised that “fart” applications were so popular on the iPhone, and how stupid that is. Why are all these middle aged men buying fart apps? They aren’t. These same people wonder why “Britney Spears” was the number one search on Google. Guess what? It’s not **YOU**, middle aged guy, who is buying the iPhone, iPod, and iPad. It’s kids! It’s teenagers! Little boys, little girls, mom, grandma and grandpa. They don’t read blogs. They don’t watch Apple announcement videos. They just buy things that are cool and work. And it’s those people who are going to buy the iPad in droves. Yeah, dad and tech geeks (like YOU READING THIS) will whine about how stupid it is, then you’ll go buy it anyway…admit it, you know you will. But the REAL SALES are going to come from the kids, the teens, and the older people who NEVER had a computer before. The iPad absolutely, positively will be REVOLUTIONARY because it will be the first computer many people have ever had. Yup, it will be the first computer your baby, your toddler, and your grams and your gramps ever had! They don’t want to worry about gigs, mhz, serial/parallel/usb/or mouseport mice, and antivirus software — they will just merge their beings right into this “magical” device; you’ll see. Don’t believe me? Go to the Apple Store and watch toddlers. And while I’m not sure….I “suspect” that lots of people who can’t see the magical and revolutionary nature of this device don’t have iPhones. And if you don’t have an iPhone, you don’t “get it” yet. You will, but you can’t until you experience one of Apple’s amazing touch-screens. Yep, that’s the magic. Apple’s touch technology is simply “Magical”. I balked on the iPhone because it looked so simple, I mistakenly thought its functionalities were just basic. Boy, was I wrong. That tiny little phone is quite often what I must use while I’m sitting at the massive desktop…because some of those iphone apps offer functionality that isn’t available on the web. I call that revolutionary. Just you wait. This is going to be big. Is Apple stock undervalued? OH HELL YEAH.

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