Memovator: The Toughest Game You’ll Ever Love (or love to hate)
Filed under: Games, Product Reviews, iPhone, iPod Touch
When it comes to the iPhone, it seems casual games have enjoyed the greatest success, and it doesn’t get any more casual than a game that almost always ends in 2 or 3 minutes. Memovator is just such a game, or at least it is for me.
Like most great games, Memovator is extremely simple to play, yet extremely difficult to master. The game puts you in the role of an elevator operator – an occupation not seen since the days of Looney Tunes cartoons. As each person enters the elevator, they will tell you which of the 20 floors they would like to get off on. The elevator makes a constant loop from floor 1 to 20 and back down again. When you hit a requested floor, just tap anywhere on the screen to stop the elevator and let the passengers out and let new ones in. Simple, right? Well, try it, and see how far you get. I’m stuck around 27 or so… without cheating, that is. (Incidentally, If you are interested in reading about a Memovator cheat that could give you a score of 200 or more, check out our sister site The iPhone Cheat Sheet). Read more
Apple’s new iPod touch web ads almost makes you think the touch is a real gaming machine
Filed under: Apple Bashing, Apple Fanboyism, Hardware, Opinion, iPhone, iPod Touch
It’s no secret Apple is pushing the iPod touch as a gaming machine – Steve Jobs said as much when lamely trying to explain why the new iPod touches didn’t have a camera (as if game makers couldn’t find a creative way to make use of one).
But if there was any lingering doubt that Apple was trying to push the iPhone/touch platform further into the mindset of hard core gamers, this new web ad on super gaming site IGN ought to clear up any misconceptions.
Unfortunately, even a fanboy such as myself must admit that the iPod touch and the iPhone are somewhat lacking when it comes to games. For the past year I have tried to convince myself the touch screen could be made to take the place of analog controls, but I just can’t kid myself anymore. As the games being released become increasingly complex and ever more graphically stunning, it’s obvious that the interior of the iPod touch is more than up to the task of handheld gaming – but it’s the outside that needs work.
Oh sure, many developers have come up with clever tricks and inventive control schemes, but aside from a few standout casual games that were inherently designed for the touch screen interface (Flight Control, Puzzlings, Fieldrunners…) the majority of games would benefit GREATLY from some sort of analog control buttons. Sure, driving games LOOK like they work great in the 2 second clips in the Apple ads, and tilting to steer works well enough, but find me ONE die hard racer who likes having to precisely hit certain areas of a flat screen while turning said screen in order to break, shift, shoot, etc. Even some of the first games ever made (PacMan, BurgerTime, Frogger) are too difficult to play on the touch. And forget about First Person Shooters and Football. No matter how impressive the graphics, and no matter how well companies like Gameloft are able to design their psuedo-analog controllers, covering 35% of an already cramped screen with your thumbs is no way to play a game.
Above: Where the hell is the iControl Pad?
Quite frankly I am surprised Apple has not yet come out with it’s own dockable gamepad/external battery device. Remember the GameBone, the iJoyPad, and the ethereal iControlPad? They all looked great (well, they all appeared to WORK great, that is) but despite over a year of publicity and hype, to date not one has physically shown up here at the lab for testing (note to those developers, please send us one for testing, we’re DYING over here!).
Above: …and the GameBone?
Quite frankly by now Apple should not only have come out with its own controller, but it should have also have released a set of APIs to let developers incorporate the controls into their games. So far the avalanche of iPhone/iPod touch peripherals I expected after Apple announced support for 3rd party hardware earlier this year has yet to materialize. At this point it is pretty clear that if Apple wants to create a viable gaming accessory market, it is going to have to get the ball rolling itself – perhaps even literally with a dockable trackball, for Centipede.
Above: … and the iJoyPad?
In the family friendly hand-held gaming arena, there is no doubt that Nintendo is still king, but if Apple truly wants to compete with the big boys, they’re going to need to take a page from the New England Patriot’s playbook, and take a page from their competitor’s playbook. Nintendo always markets its own (usually superior) peripherals for its consoles and handhelds, but also allows other companies to market their own. Apple should do the same. Without a way to control games while avoiding covering them with our fat fingers (and stereotypes be damned, most die hard gamers DO have pretty fat fingers) all the advertising on gaming sites in the world won’t bring the iPod touch true gaming street cred.
How to get 3 free iPods with only a screw driver, a pair of scissors, and a bag of marshmallows
Filed under: Apple Fanboyism, Free Stuff, Humor, iPod, iPod Touch, iPod nano, video
Damnit, I just threw out two VCRs on junk day!
Apple’s most ironically named event, ever
Filed under: Apple Fanboyism, Cynicism, That's Weird..., Updates, iPhone, iPod Touch, iPod nano, iPod shuffle
Well, Apple’s “It’s only Rock ‘n Roll, but I like it” event has come to a close, and it had virtually nothing to do with Rock ‘n Roll, or even music in general. Sure, just about every announcement made today had something to do with the iPod, iPhone, or iTunes, yet it was all about apps, video cameras, price drops, and pedometers.
So, what did Apple announce? Well, new iPod touches with more capacity, faster processors (presumably matching the iPhone 3G S) and bigger storage (even bigger than the iPhone). New iPod nanos – also with video cameras – as well as a built-in pedometer for workouts and an FM radio (what? No AM!?!?!) The shuffle got no love, but did receive a price drop, so maybe someone will buy it now.
But the big news is iTunes 9, which got a major revamp to accommodate music apps. Yes, new Genius features for recommending apps you might like based on your buying preferences, new iPhone/iPod touch application managing from within iTunes, and new application ranking charts to make developers happier. Top it all off with the new iPhone/iPod touch OS 3.1, and you have a music-less announcement rivaling a Mac Pro unveiling. Even the much rumored Beatles announcement was a no-show. Sure, Apple announced they would now offer LP bundles for some albums which will tack on music videos and photos to Album purchases, but since iTunes pretty much single-handedly killed the album format, this two-minute announcement hardly warranted taking over the event poster.
All in all it was a pretty decent (albeit expected) series of nice hardware updates, and a nice update to iTunes (that should have come 2 years ago).
One more thing
But of course to any true Apple fan, the fact that we got to see Steve Jobs back on stage and standing on his own power was the biggest thrill of the afternoon (although I would have personally preferred to see him walk through some sort of hoop or something to prove there were no wires controlling him).
Melon Golf: Tim Burton meets Tiger Woods
Filed under: Games, Product Reviews, iPhone, iPod Touch
Just thought I’d throw out a recommendation to iPhone-physics lovers of a game I’ve been playing the past few days – Melon Golf
As you play each round you can unlock Stars which will in turn unlock bonus rounds in the Nightmare Course.
I think the reason I like Melon Golf so much is that it really has very little to do with Golf – it’s actually much more similar to games like Cannon Challenge and Castle Smasher than golf. The object of the game is to launch your “melon” towards the “hole” in the recommended number of shots or less (like Golf) but the launching/aiming mechanism is more akin to launching type games with a “power” and “angle” setting for each shot. The video below will give a better idea of the overall game mechanics, as well as the eerily wonderful visuals, as the game really needs to be seen in motion to be appreciated.
The first level (easy) is fairly straight forward and just introduces you to the way the game is played, but as you go you unlock harder levels, and the obstacles between you and the hole become more creative (as do your solutions to overcoming them). Read more
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