Apple blames iPod nano screen defects on obese Americans/tight pants
Apple today officially acknowledged that a small number of iPod nano owners have reported problems with the hot-selling music player. Customers are reporting instances where after removing the iPod nano from their front pockets (much as Steve Jobs did during the iPod nano’s famous unveiling) finding that the nano’s LCD screen is cracked, and in some instances, no longer works at all.
Apple’s SVP of Marketing Phil Schiller said today in a press release “…this issue has affected less than 1/10 of 1 percent of the total iPod nano units that we’ve shipped. It is not a design issue. It has more to do with obese Americans in tight pants putting the nano in their front jeans pocket, and then sitting for extended periods of time.”
Blaming the nano’s screen issues on fat people is not the first time Apple has come under fire for attacking its super-sized customers. In 1998 the American Obesity Association filed a complaint against Apple charging the company’s hot-selling iMac computer shipped with a miniature keyboard and mouse that could not accommodate the enlarged fingers of obese Americans. In the complaint, the AOA alleges the keyboard made correct spelling all but impossible for large fingers that would sometimes accidentally press up to 3 keys at a time. The “hockey puck” mouse that shipped with the unit was also criticized for not being able to support the increased weight of a 7 pound hand. During extended use the track ball would often become oval-shaped, causing the mouse to stop functioning corectly.
The AOA’s Gabrielle Vargas says Apple computers have always been a favorite of husky Americans, due in large part to Apple’s insistance on using the 1-button mouse. The 1 button mouse is perfectly designed for fat fingers which often find multi-button mice unwieldy. Apple has also designed its operating systems to be navigated with a single-click mouse, eliminating the need for right-clicking. “It is this loyalty from our members” says Vargas, “that has helped Apple capture over 3% of the personal computer market. For Apple to now blame manufacturing defects in its newest iPod on ‘fat people wearing tight pants’ is just plain wrong.”
According to the AOA, Approximately 127 million adults in the U.S. are overweight, 60 million obese, and 9 million severely obese. If Apple worked harder to actively cater (no pun intended) to the obese, it could mean a huge (no pun intended) increase in market share.
Apple, for its part, seems to realize this. It has offered to replace the “defective” nanos. However, they are insisting that all customers weighing over 230 Pounds also agree to sign a form stating they will carry their nano in an altoids case for protection.
very funny. I followed the link found on one of the posts on the Apple discussion board at the Motley Fool investment site. thx for the laugh.
I have to side with apple on this one. If you’re fat, that’s your problem. Nobody elses. So for GODS SAKE wear some baggy clothes at least. I mean, I’m no male modeling superstar, but I fit through doorways, and I don’t crush iPods when I sit on them 😛
Of course. Blame people for their disabilities, for their poverty, for their lack of education. It’s never the fault of the designer or the corporation that they make and sell product which not everybody can use. Why? To save a few pennies per unit of product–more profit. “Why should we bear the additional cost when the cost can be displaced? Let someone else pay!” Looks to me like a fundamental flaw in our laws and in our way of thinking.
uh, dave, you do realize this was a *joke*, right?
uh, matt, i think the poster above is a fat, fat, fatty fatty fat fat.
lose some wait dave
*loose
i think lose is correct.
Dave…how about you take some personal responsiblity for a nice change of pace…
Dave,
You seem like a very angry person. Sorry you feel victimized by the big corporations who market useful products that you in turn voluntarily consume in exchange for money. How is that a fundamental flaw in our laws and way of thinking?
Dave
being fat is NOT a disabilitie.
/is fat
//does not have a nano
///will never have one
its becoming ok to be fat now a days. i mean, look at tv, fat men having sex and makin kids and having problems dealing with every day life with thier skinny(sp?) wifes. And i’m sure all of them have an iPod…or atleast a mini, ‘cuz the nano i guess it to much of a risk (lol).
we love you dave.
I’m sorry, but I don’t see a reason to complain, you bought the product, no one forced it on you. It is your responsibility to take care of it, not apple’s.
LOL..really funny!
I must agree with eric.
Eric, why should Apple replace every broken Nano when it’s their fault for being so fat? I agree that they should have a contract which needs to be signed and that the AOA is overeacting cos their all fat.
jesus christ… being fat isnt a disability its called lazy and too much food. get som exersice its not apples fault u break their nanos its yours. Obviously if u cant take care of a nano then just get an ipod mini or something.
I think seeing “lose some wait”, followed by a typo correction of “loose” is probably the funniest thing I’ve read this week.
Ummm… iPods arn’t made for fat people anyways. Imagine the iPod commercials with dancing fat people. That’s a lot of broken iPod screen, that is if they don’t think it’s a Twinkie-O-The-Future… or maybe a Triscut? Either way the’re probally sync them only once. Fat people make me sick.
Hmm, I wonder how Fat people can make use of the click wheel.
Are they then pushing everything at the same time?
Lol, Also I dont think its only fat people with tight jeans…
I think its safe to say that most EMO people wear tight jeans as well…
I could never follow that fad anyway…
… wow that is awsome, major props to apple stick it to the fat man lol. I’ve got a great idea we should design all products so that fat people can’t use them, your couch will have a weight limit of 300 pounds, your remote will have both an on and off button that are tiny and right next to each other, your fork will be designed to shock you when you eat too much. MUWAHAHAHA they won’t have a choice they’ll have to lose weight.
WASTING TIME……..Thats what this article really says
come on Fat-Nano and people crying look
apple has no fault on thios one you buy the nano you take care of the nano
it not apple’s fault it scratches very eaisly
come on people THATS WHY U TAKE CARE OF THINGS AND NOT COMPLAIN
apple has a one year apple care protection plan on it
BUT IT DOES NO COVER A SCRATED IPOD
how tech do you have to be SCRATCH YOUR IPOD
If you really want to be portectvie DO NOT BUY ONE….BUY A CD PLAYER
IM A BIG GUY I HAVE A NANO AND I BOUGHT A TUBE FOR IT IT DOES NO SCRATCH ALSO I HAVE A PROTECTIVE SCREEN YOU CAN BUY ONLINE
GET IT
GOT IT
GOOOD…..NIMRODS
I just can’t believe there is actually an American Obesity Association. Seriously people, if you are fat, lose the weight, or live with it. Don’t blame your fat asses on others.
Obesity is not apple’s problem… The engineering marvel that is the iPod nano should not be held up or changed because of our over-weight population. I agree with the altoids idea.
I agree with Apples point. But I have to add that it isn’t just the over weight people. Look at the young females wearing the tight jeans and shorts. They are doing the same thing.
This article is great and brought a huge smile to my face but what really made the article hilarious are the comments from people who took this seriously… w00t
well why dont these lards get their fat asses away from the computer and do some aerobics.. then maybe they wouldnt have this problem!
hahahaha
this is great…just hilarious
I think eqrunner has a point.
I for one plan to start looking at all the young females wearing the tight jeans and shorts.
I wonder if Dave typed that on his GIANT keyboard, of with the aid of a special “dialing wand”, a la The Simpsons!
being fat IS a disability. Just pathetic.
S is right, its a proven scientific fact that some people are meant to be ‘large’…now how large is large…well who knows…but im sure dieting and exercising would freaking help…very cool article, and funny comments lol, are people really THAT lazy that they cant right click their mouse while freaking sitting down…cmon!
FUCK APPLE!! They have to make excuses as to why their products are a pos and break easily!
Steve Jobs and Apple are the fucking ANTI-CHRIST! Skinny people wear tight pants all the fucking time! How dare they? The mindless Apple lemmings will keep marching along with them though. I have half a mind buy an Apple just to smash it to pieces!!
Half a mind, indeed. And I bet Steve Jobs will be counting his money while you count the “pieces” of your Apple and the interest on your credit card you used to purchase it with just like every other American caught up in the Obesity known as Voracious Consumerism. Now THAT’S a disease/disability I wouldn’t mind contributing to combat.
It always amazes me just what rabbid little morons Macvangelists can be. I really think that sometimes Mac folks are the Jehovahs Witnesses of the computer world. I own a mac and have since 89 but this is just silly. Apple has ALWAYS had a problem admitting that anything is their fault. The broken screens are broken because of a manufacturing defect at one of the contracted factories that produce and assemble components. This is nothing new! Ford has been having problems like this for almos 100 years! For Apple to blame their customers for their manufacturing defects instead of recalling the product and replacing it (and charging their vendors for the cost, as is common in every industry) is just one more example of the nerdy kid in the corner who cant accept he got a B on his test! DEAL WITH IT!
I know, the word “Mac” is short for Macintosh and should therefore be capitalized…. I can just imagine some rabbid little Mac-puppy is just wetting himself and saying “He didn’t capitalize Mac, he’s wrong and im right… hehehehehe”
This is why Apple comes out with substandard products two for one to their amazing products, they are sniveling little twirps just like their fanbase…
If this really is a joke and not really what the Apple SVP said, it is truly hilarious. It is also a great example of what I read in the comments of any product review that dares not shower an Apple device with 100 percent praise…
I don’t get why fat people need tiny ipod nanos. They’re designed for thin people anyway. Thin people who are not as lucky as fatty-fats who have much more real estate to hang gadgets on their extra-long belts. Fat people are lucky because they can carry around more tech.
Therefore, I conclude that thin people are the disabled ones.
And, Chbbles, Schiller DID say something similar.
Has it occured to anyone to check the official press release page at Apples web site to find out if this is really a joke or not? You fucking morons.
Honestly I don’t care if thats the reason the Ipods are getting scratched up. Fat people are the real problem here! And while I’m very happy to hear that they are taking a step in the right direction and buying apples, buying Apple’s Ipod nano isn’t going to help them lose weight, they need to buy real apples… and then eat them. Besides where are fat people going that they need a portable music player? Theres already a CD player in the car, and one on the computer, god knows they are not taking it to the gym.
Why should Apple do anything more? if 99.9 percent of their products are accepted by average & thin people, there is no valid reason that Apple should cater to those lard butts who supersize their own butts.
If your massive enough to take two seats in an airplane, then pay for two seats.
I am tired of fat butts complaining they encounter “Cheap” furniture that breaks when they sit on it.
Have a doctor sew your lips together for a few months so you drop 200 pounds.
Igor,
I got the exact same reaction when I wrote this:
http://mashable.com/2005/09/12/is-the-ipod-nano-too-thin/
Great post.
Why should Apple change a product because Americans are fucking fat. Period, as you yanks put it.
Why should over people have to change thing’s for the week-minded?
“I don’t get why fat people need tiny ipod nanos. They’re designed for thin people anyway…” Great point! Next they will moan that it’s to small for them, well why the fuck did you buy it chubby? Maybe its like fat people buying Diet Coke.
Apple does not like Fat People
*lose some WEIGHT dave*
Yes Stace, i am retarded 🙁
I barely remember posting this, I was most probably intoxicated at the time :S
George Bush – That is because fat people do not likes apples 😛
wow this is retarted blaming the fat kids (well adults) as an obese kid i think that he is just finding something to blame for his shooty product, well the screen atleast, if he would have paid 10 cents more per screen to buy a beter plastic, this would have never happend