13 Things you may not know about Steve Jobs
Steve Jobs’ alleged liver transplant came as a bit of a shock to Apple fans this week. Given that Jobs is one of the most high-profile and rumored-about CEO’s on the interweb, sometimes we may feel we know everything there is to know about the man. However, Steve is like an onion. He’ll make you cry if you cut him. AND he has layers. Many layers. Here are 13 little known facts that you may not be aware of about everyone’s favorite Apple CEO (not including Gil, of course).
#1 Steve’s liver transplant is not his first organ transplant operation. Over the last 400 years Steve has been gradually replacing all his organs as they wear out.
#2 Steve Jobs’ favorite color is a special color that only he can see called “flursch”. According to a 1996 Vanity Fair article, Steve once described flursch as “sort of like how you see purple, except it’s just about as different as you can imagine.”
#3 Steve Jobs CAN believe it’s not butter.
#4 Steve Jobs can divide by zero.
#5 “Steven Paul Jobs” is an anagram for “Elves Put Banjos”. Think about it.
#6 Despite holding a public funeral for Mac OS 9, Steve still runs Classic on his MacBook Pro to play Sid Meier’s Civilization 2.
#7 Steve has been rumored to be romantically linked to Joan Baez and ex-New York Giants quarterback Phil Simms.
#8 Steve’s first fruit-themed computer company, Elderberry Computers, went under in 1975 shortly after Monty Python’s The Holy Grail was released and turned the once proud fruit into a joke.
#9 Contrary to popular belief, there does not appear to be any direct correlation between N2N (the tail number on Steve Jobs’ Gulfstream 5 Jet) and the Los Angeles-based N2N erotic men’s clothing store.
#10 According to scientists who study such things, the “most uncomfortable moment ever recorded” occurred in Cupertino CA, March 18th, 2004 during a 75-minute Steve Jobs tongue-lashing given to a technician who could not get a projector working.
#11 Steve Jobs was originally up for the role or “Neo” in the Matrix movies, but the Wachowski brothers didn’t feel like doing a documentary.
#12 Steve Jobs can pee at a urinal even if flanked on both sides and with a line behind him.
#13 Steve Jobs has cried only once during his life – while watching the movie Sophie’s Choice. It wasn’t the heart-wrenching plot that made Steve tear up, it was reportedly the idea of a person being given “choice” that got to him.
Please add any additional “facts” you know about Steve in the comments.
Steve Jobs invented the letter “X” strictly for its marketing and promotional appeal on smallish square boxes.
Steve Jobs invented the first fully functional robot to adhere to all of Asimov’s Laws; codenamed Tim Cook.
Steve Jobs’ subconscious is so powerful, it created Jelly Belly candy only to draw inspiration from it later to design the iMac.
When Steve Jobs does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.
Steve Jobs’ ultimate goal is to be the first elected iPresident.
Steve Jobs’ first attempt at a robot failed (see Steve Balmer).
The press got the facts all jumbled once again. Steve Jobs did not get a liver transplant in Tennessee. He had a personal fusion reactor (Code name Tennessee) installed at the Lawrence Livermore Labs.
Steve Jobs’ was the fifth Beetle!
Steve Jobs’ does not have two left feet, in fact he has two ambidextrous feet to be able to dance anyway he pleases.
Steve Jobs is a cybernetic organism, Cyberdyne systems model 101.
Steve Jobs has been seen having his cake and eating it, too.
When he has insomnia, Steve laughs himself to sleep by reading Dell annual reports.
Steve can heal the sick with his bare hands, but refuses to touch an Xbox.
Kryptonite gives Steve a killer buzz.
Steve once wrestled his inner demons and died, but was sent back to earth as Steve the White “until his task was finished.”
This is criminally unfunny. Don’t give up your day job mate.
Are you kidding? This is great. Thanks for another entertaining article.
you are a moron, grow up
reminds me of the chuck norris jokes
I’m with Matthew. Shockingly flat.
I have smiled ! This is a funny post !!
I think it’s funny, and that’s all that matters.
Chuck Norris is an invention of Steve Jobs, designed by Jonathan Ive.
After being burned by releasing products before society could “get” them (Newton, NeXTCube, etc.), Steve Jobs now has 27 things in his garage that will become the basis of 22nd century existence, but he’s keeping them to himself.
This is really really unfunny. Especially #1. It’s not even remotely smart…
This is Steve Jobs 143 incarnation. Like Dr Who when he dies he becomes another Brilliant man in history.
Steve Jobs is adopted and has a daughter, Lisa.
Steve Jobs also only uses 10% of his brain ….. Any more and the ISS would implode
I am sensing a new Internet Meme… “The Steve Job Jokes”
Steve Jobs is not bound to the laws of Equivalent Exchange.
I believe he said “Please add any additional “facts” you know about Steve in the comments.” not “tell me how unfunny i am.” i think it’s hilarious and more so than chuck norris jokes. so i think posts besides mine that have no facts about steve should not exist in these comments.
Steve Jobs invented God. then he made God 3g. but we like to call him “Jesus Christ”
looks like my post counts now since i added a “Fact”
Steve Jobs is dead. The “actual” one is a replacement made by Massive Dynamics.
Haha, funny, I like #4 very much.
“Steve Jobs created iNternet….” So bad…
Steve Jobs nixed the floppy cus the OS team never managed to make it format without rendering the machine useless!
(I bet you didnt remeber that one :D)
The “Next Big Thing”? Steve Jobs new liver is actually the first personal bio-computer with DBA (Direct Brain Access). Steve has been in desperate need of such a device since verbal + typed traditional human communication has been too slow for him –he has the next 20 years of inventions already in his head.
At the next keynote, expect “A dozen last things”.
(Multi-touch input was left out at Steve’s request).
Steven Jobs is actually Bill Gates 3GS
stever jobs can do a wheelie on a unicycle 😀
Steve Jobs knows that with great computational power, comes great accessibility.
Steve Jobs is really a Furian and ruler of the Underverse!
Steve Jobs runs Mac OS X Lion on his iPhone, and iPhone OS 4.0 on his Mac.
Steve Jobs thinks therefore he is.
Steve Jobs can paste a picture in windowz Notepad
Mac OS x isn’t a engineered software, it is one of Steve’s droppings.
this site was no help….and SOOOOO STUPID