iPhone vs Sex: One Brave iPhone Addict Speaks Out - Macenstein

iPhone vs Sex: One Brave iPhone Addict Speaks Out

IRINA VORONINA
Photos by Joe Scarnici

From the MacRumors Forums comes a tale so unsettling, so pathetic, and so (unfortunately) relate-able, that we felt we needed to pass it along. In response to the discussion thread “iPhone addiction”, forum member evilgreg shared this story of how he has become so iPhone addicted he literally pulled out mid-coitus to answer a We Rule push notification. Needless to say, his girlfriend was less than flattered.

I can answer yes to all, ESPECIALLY the relationship one. Here’s the story:

My gf is not a big fan of cell phones at all and since the first day that I bought the iphone she didnt like it. She hated the fact that at dinner and breakfast i would just fiddle with my new toy and completely ignore her and make no effort at conversation (hey, who can blame me! the thing has so many apps for everything! the crossword app is ADDICTING). and in bed at night we used to read books together and cuddle but i would stay up all night watching podcasts and browsing the web on my side of the bed.

what really set her off was the time we went to her parents house for thanksgiving dinner and i was supposed to carve the turkey so i looked up an app for turkey recommendations and wine pairing but i got so sucked in that i forgot to actually carve the turkey! i ended up sitting on the phone in my chair for over an hour and didnt talk to anyone-i even forgot to grab a plate until someone brought one to me (i forgot who) and her one aunt apparently got mad when they said grace and i was not paying attention. but come on! we do thanksgiving every friggin year! who cares if one time i was on my phone.

after that she tried to start a rule that no iphone were allowed in the house or she would break up with me (we were engaged, together for about 5 yrs at that point). whatever, i said, if u cant take me for who i am then we shouldnt be together. she ended up not enforcing that rule and stayed together with me for a few months. we finally broke up when she approached me bc we didnt have sex in like months so she wanted to with me but during sex (no joke–this really happened lol) i got a push notification that my WeRule crop was ready to be harvested…needless to say i couldnt keep going with her and had to harvest my crop. after i did that and some other things, about an hour later she wouldnt continue and we went to sleep. turns out she was crying and the next morning she packed up! lol! whatever.

Just another example of how mysterious the female mind is.

Thanks to faithful Macenstein reader Mike for the tip!

Comments
12 Responses to “iPhone vs Sex: One Brave iPhone Addict Speaks Out”
  1. winteregel says:

    Understandable, but pretty pathetic none the less imo..

  2. Chris Leither says:

    Non understandable… my gf was actually like the dude in this story. Pathetic… 100 fucking percent pathetic.
    I simply cannot understand that. Yeah I LOVE my iPhone… and I love my iPad and Mac and blah… but… WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU ?!

    You’ve been together for a longer period of time than you’d keep THIS iPhone anyway…

    Douche…

    Not that he was gonna read it here…

  3. Justin says:

    And that’s why I drink! Much safer addiction if you ask me.

  4. Jonro says:

    If this isn’t a joke, the guy needs therapy or needs to be alone with his iPhone. So, is his ex dating anyone? 😉

  5. Min says:

    Best part of the story: “I couldn’t keep going with her and had to harvest my crop”. Lol.

  6. St.Jimmy says:

    This was a worthless piece of text, next time include a picture of the ex… that makes judging easier…

    Who am I kidding: this guy, if all true, is so bloody lame. Being engaged for over 5 years and still didn’t pop the question, being anti-social and seems to be afraid of his fiance…

  7. Richard says:

    I think this guy is an idiot, if I had a choice between sex and my iPhone, sorry Apple you gotta go!!!

  8. Raptor007 says:

    What can I say but your are going to die alone on the toilet with your iPhone and that’s about it. Seriously, you chose your phone over sex, you lost your fiance over the phone. You need to get a real life. Then again they always say there is someone for everyone, we just didn’t anticipate this level of computer sex yet.

  9. MasterMacNikon says:

    I am inclined to see what this fracker’s POV will be once he has not had “any” for a decent stretch of time.

    He is sure to change his ‘tune’ in short order.

    heheheheheh

  10. fractured says:

    Yeah, I agree that this should be accompanied by a picture of the ex. Seriously, why would he be that into WeRule? This guy should get his priorities straight and get on the phone AFTER he finishes with the girl!

  11. Mark S. says:

    I love my iPhone, but that dude is a LOSER.

  12. Loweded Wookie says:

    The fact this idiot has been engaged for 5 years shows that he wasn’t really committed to her.

    She was well within her rights to ditch this pathetic loser.

    What a dink.

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