Macenstein

Do you own an iPhone? Do you like to sign up for mysterious things without knowing why? Then head over to TheBlackApp. But hurry! Space is limited!!!!

Above: OMG! SPACE IS LIMITED!!!

Faithful Macenstein reader David sent us a link to the cryptic homepage of what appears to be perhaps a combination of Sam’s Club and American Express for the iPhone called “TheBlackApp”. Details are very scarce on the site, in fact all we know (aside from that the site’s creators couldn’t find a current iPhone screen to use in their art) is BlackApps bills itself as “The First iPhone Consumer Network”, and that there are 3 tiers to said network (Silver, Gold and Black) with Black appearing to be the most exclusive. Unfortunately, with no real information, we have no idea why you would want to sign up for any of the 3 apps, or how they differ, or what they are, or why you’d care. However, since they named the site TheBlackApp, we’re going to go ahead and assume that’s the exclusive tier where all the cool kids will be hanging out. Sort of like a Black Amex card.

So, is it all hype? Of course. This “tickle your ass with a feather” tactic reminds me of the classic Simpsons episode where TV, Radio, and Billboards all announced that Gabo was coming to town. With so little information, we can only guess at how awesome TheBlackApp will be, and that’s the whole point. The site’s owners, epicapps, says TheBlackApp will be launching in earnest on June 5th, so I suppose we’ll have to wait until then to know the full details, so it remains to be seen whether TheBlackApp turns out to be the next mobile “Amazon.com” or nothing more ventriloquist and wooden dummy, as with Gabo on The Simpsons.

With so little information available, at this point I think only an idiot would sign up… and so, yes, I signed up. How could I not? I mean, SPACE IS LIMITED for crying out loud!

And of course I went ahead and chose “The Black App”, because after all, only a tool would want the Silver or Gold App.

I think.

Crap, now I have to sign up for all 3.