Taliban leader “addicted” to his iPhone - Macenstein

Taliban leader “addicted” to his iPhone

When I hear the word “Taliban”, many (largely bearded) images spring to mind, but an iPhone is not one of them. However, according to a recent report by Al Jazeera, the iPhone is quickly becoming one of the Taliban’s favorite Tools of Terror (and no, we aren’t just talking about the farting apps).

Mullah Zaif, the former Taliban ambassador to Pakistan, says he is ‘addicted’ to his iPhone

Hamish Macdonald, writing for Al Jazeera, spent one month in Kabul profiling the region during this historic transition period where the United States is shifting its focus from Iraq to Afghanistan, and helping to lay the groundwork for upcoming elections. Macdonald discovered that the once technophobic Taliban (which had pretty much banned all technology during its pre-2001 rule) has since done a complete 180 on its stance on gadgetry, as evidenced by his interview with former Taliban ambassador to Pakistan Mullah Zaif, who is under house-arrest somewhere outside of Kabul:

“I could not believe my eyes. We had arrived to interview Mullah Zaif, the Taliban’s former ambassador to Pakistan who is now under virtual house-arrest on the outskirts of Kabul, when he walked into the room, sat down on the couch and pulled out an iPhone.
I asked Zaif about his gadget. His response was pretty much the same as everyone who owns an iPhone.
“I’m addicted,” he said, “the internet is great on this, very fast.”

According to Macdonald, the iPhone is part of a wider-reaching adoption of new technologies that helps the Taliban “wage their war in a sophisticated fashion, using not just guns and bombs, but messages and propaganda too.”

Well hey, if the iPhone is responsible for a shift in Taliban policy from bombs to text messages, then I guess this is a good thing. Unless, of course, they use their new found ability to text message to sabotage the American Idol voting. That shit’s sacred.

16 Responses to “Taliban leader “addicted” to his iPhone”
  1. I’m not allowed to discuss whether iFlinger had been commissioned by the CIA.


  2. Alex says:

    Hey looky, an app that turns the iPhone into a suicide bomb. There really is an app for everything.

  3. dlowe402 says:

    O.K. so iI guess it’s jailbroken since I haven’t heard of any carriers in Afghanistan. Apple should hunt him down like the dog he is!!

  4. Hmmm says:

    Cant wait for the Taliban Mac Chick of the month showing some ankle! Wooot.

  5. MacSheikh says:

    “I’m addicted,” he said, “the internet is great on this, very fast.”

    Lol! That’s almost exactly what the guy I bumped into at Starbucks recently said! 😀

    On a related note, June/July really can’t come soon enough for me. Man, even the Taliban guy has an iPhone!

  6. ipod touch says:

    still waiting for the first Taliban app. You know, the one pours goat milk into the cup and after you drink it, you start beating your women.

  7. Realist says:

    Ummm, you are a little behind the times. Of course they have iPhone, you guys been living in the dark ages?

  8. odin says:

    His favorite game is Infidel Runners.

  9. iShervin says:

    oh dear god… save us all…

  10. Justin says:

    Are we sure it’s not a myPhone?

  11. dammitjanet says:

    oh dear there’s a few bad puns above me, here’s my additions to the pot. I feel some of these are in very bad taste and will probably pass the Apple App Store QA process without any issues.

    iSheikh – guide your Taliban through the desert to the oasis. kill your enemies and rise to the pinnacle of power and become Skiekh Al as’Bin Allover.

    YouTube – Taliban special edition – watch the infidel smart bombs as they zoom towards your safe house in 1000’s of different shades of green and gray.

    Minesweeper – guide your Taliban through the minefield using small children and animals as guides, watch the blood splatter as they take a wrong step.

  12. Jonro says:

    Can we track his location with Google Earth?

  13. Ethan says:

    “Can we track his location with Google Earth?”

    And do what with it?

  14. Kingdomlyf says:

    @Jonro We’re not talking about Bin Laden here. . . . This guy is on house arrest, they know exactly where he is. . .

  15. Macaholic says:

    “Can we track his location with Google Earth?”

    No — but maybe he Twitters? 😀

  16. Tice says:

    These guys always remind me of Achmed “I kill you!”:

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