Review: Totemo – My New Time Burglar
As odd as it may seem, not all iPhone games begin life on the iPhone. Game maker Hexage seems to have an “Android first” mentality that while seemingly a ludicrous waste of time from a business standpoint, at least lets them iron out most of their games bugs before porting to a “real” platform. One such game is their newly released Totemo, a sort of match... Read More
The app is rated 9+, but I think the icon might be NC-17
So Capcom’s new Ghosts’n’Goblins Gold for the iPhone is out, and – GOOD LORD ARTHUR’S PACKING!!!. Above: I remember in the NES version Arthur having a slight bulge, but this is just disturbing. Well, the good news is I doubt any Ghost or Goblin will come within 20 feet of this guy. Who the hell made this icon?!? Whoever it was got a little confused... Read More
Memovator: The Toughest Game You’ll Ever Love (or love to hate)
When it comes to the iPhone, it seems casual games have enjoyed the greatest success, and it doesn’t get any more casual than a game that almost always ends in 2 or 3 minutes. Memovator is just such a game, or at least it is for me. Like most great games, Memovator is extremely simple to play, yet extremely difficult to master. The game puts you in the role of an elevator... Read More
A game you may not want to win
Want a sneak peek at Apple’s next iPod touch commercial? I’m pretty sure it’s only a matter of time before we see Mystery Butt showcased by Apple set to a catchy tune. What’s so interesting about Mystery Butt is it’s a game that you really shouldn’t be all that proud to be good at. I mean sure, most of us can tell the difference between a penguin’s... Read More
This is why virgins shouldn’t write sex apps
And just how the hell am I supposed to do that? Purely for research purposes I decided to check out “A Sexy Party Game for Lovers 1.5“, one of the 40,000 “sex game-themed” apps on the iTunes store. And I hate to admit it, but apparently I am doing EVERYTHING wrong. Hopefully the next tip says “Make up some excuse for your creepy behavior, like... Read More
Melon Golf: Tim Burton meets Tiger Woods
Just thought I’d throw out a recommendation to iPhone-physics lovers of a game I’ve been playing the past few days – Melon Golf As you play each round you can unlock Stars which will in turn unlock bonus rounds in the Nightmare Course. I think the reason I like Melon Golf so much is that it really has very little to do with Golf – it’s actually much more... Read More
Game maker uses iTablet rumors to plug its iPhone game
OK, the compositing leaves a bit to be desired, but this insanely fake “iTablet” leaked video running the upcoming iPhone tower-defense game “Towers of War” by Conniption Entertainment is still a pretty clever promotional idea, given how high the demand for iTablet rumors has gotten these days. BTW, I wouldn’t mind testing that game out, if the developers... Read More
“iFlighter Control” totally revamps the Flight Control genre
If you look quickly at these shots of the new game iFlighter Control you might foolishly think the game is a total rip-off of the wildly successful game Flight Control which has dominated the iTunes charts for months. But if you look closely, you’ll notice that the developers cleverly moved the pause button to the top of the screen from the bottom, thus totally changing the... Read More
When you get so good at a game you love… that you hate it
As anyone who’s ever spent an extended period of time with me will attest, “familiarity breeds contempt”. And while I am used to this saying applying to human interactions, I never thought it would sum up my relationship with some of my favorite iPhone apps. Yet here I am with a score of 528 in Flight Control, and I practical dread playing it now. So, what’s... Read More
Review: Defender Chronicles – It’s better than Percocet
I thought I’d take a quick moment to give a shout out to Defender Chronicles ($2.99 iTunes link), a game so addicting that it pretty much got me through my 3-day appendectomy stay in the hospital last month and made me forget the pain the way Percocet couldn’t. Since for the most part I was in too much pain to sleep I more or less played Chronicles for 96 hours straight,... Read More
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